French philosopher tells mums to be women first, mothers second

MELBOURNE - A controversial French philosopher and leading feminist has argued that mothers, including those in Australia, need to be women first and mothers second.

Elisabeth Badinter says most are trying too hard and have become slaves to their children.

Badinter claims in her controversial new book, Le Conflit, La Femme et la Mere (The Conflict, the Woman and the Mother), that mothers should ditch the pureed organic pumpkins, eco-friendly cloth nappies and breast-feeding and get their lives back.

According to the Herald Sun, she claims in the bestseller, which has already caused a storm in Britain and the US, that they should follow the lead of traditional French mamans, who feel no guilt about using powdered milk, jars of baby food and day care if they’re so inclined.

“We’ve always been mediocre mothers here,” the Courier Mail quoted her as saying in an interview with a British newspaper.

“But we’ve tended to have happier lives,” she stated.

Badinter’s message appears to be striking a chord with stressed-out Aussie mums.

Amanda Cox, of Moonee Ponds in Melbourne is a mother of three. She is a founder of the Bad Mothers Club, a support group for women fed up with trying to be the perfect parent.

The club, which encourages mums to talk openly about the trials of raising children, has attracted more than 1900 members since it started four years ago.

Cox agreed with that motherhood had turned into a form of oppression.

“I totally get where she’s coming from,” she said.

“I think we’re under far too much pressure, I think we’re being told too much stuff about how to bring up our kids, and I think there’s just too much conflicting information,” she stated.

Anna Katich, of Melbourne suburb Box Hill, is a mother of three-year-old daughter, Lily. She left her mothers’ group two years ago because she found fellow members too competitive.

“Out of all of the mothers in the group, I was the only one who bottle-fed my baby,” she said.

“I just decided when I was pregnant that I would bottle-feed, so my husband could help me at night.

“One of the other mothers tried to make me feel bad about it, but my daughter’s healthy, she’s never sick and there’s nothing wrong with her,” she added.

Top 5 mothering tips from France:

1. Be a woman first and a mother second

2. Don’t be a slave to your children

3. Don’t feel guilty about using powdered milk, jars of baby food, disposable nappies or day care

4. Go back to work

5. Have a nice glass of red or two (ANI)